#trapped

Wrong

Posted on by WordElixirist

Just for how long…

How long did I listen to conclude…

To conclude that my own emotions are wrong?

How can a feeling be wrong?

How can my sadness be drama?

Is it humanly possible to fake such painful feelings?

Just how long do I have to convince myself that nothing is wrong?

Just how long?

Till the moment I realize life has ran out of me?

Just like now?

Is it too late?

Is it too sinful to want to be happy?

How can I love myself?

How can I not live in the past?

How can I ‘fucking move on’ like they shout?

Overwhelming.

That is what it is.

Would it be wrong to ask for a break?

Because it seems… My tears have run out.

It seems… My bitterness is taking over.

My emotions have blanked out.

Let me rest… Just for a moment…

So that when I wake up, I can at the least hope to be honest to myself.

Lost.

Posted on by WordElixirist

Choking breaths,

Panting heart.

Silver clouds above humming and comforting;

Akin to caress of a mother

When the heart screams

And the anguish comes out

On the silent night;

Unbeknownst to everyone.

The image and the memories,

Haunting me, reminding me of you.

Bittersweet is this friendship;

Come back to me soon;

For I miss you.

Purity

Posted on by WordElixirist

She was beautiful.

She was sharp.

She was fast.

She was talented.

Multi talented.

Forward thinker, she was, unfortunately, for him.

She shouldn’t have been hasty.

They were right.

Choosing a partner isn’t choosing an accessory.

It was a decision of a lifetime. 

Decision of a forever. 

Akin to being reborn.

Love was plenty.

But history reminded her of it’s essence.

It repeated itself, courteously.

There she found herself, appalled by his views of the world.

And yet, unable to hate him.

Can anyone hate half of themselves?

Can anyone cut away half of their existence?

It was unthinkable.

She was an excellent minister.

And yet only one aspect mattered.

Her purity.

All else, forgotten.

From magnificent to cheap within seconds.

All for what? 

A brand of purity. A brand on her entire character. A brand on her entire existence.

Harsh world it was. 

She wished for the vial of life ending essence she always had, before she decided to live for him.

Him, who branded her, based on her purity.

Forced profession

Posted on by WordElixirist

Tried her hardest did she, to please them.

Pushed her limits, went out her way.

In a profession, she neither loved nor had any passion for.

And yet, it was never enough.

Enough for everyone around her, but for them, it never was.

She tried and tried.

Tried hard to love the profession.

Tied herself to a goal, from sheer responsibility.

No passion to drive her.

And yet, she tried.

But it was never enough. 

Never indeed.

She felt her grip loosening.

Selfish did she become.

She gave up.

One day.

Posted on by WordElixirist

One day.

One day away from this is enough for me to put my façade up again.

One day away from your taunts.

One day away from your discouraging.

One day away from this loneliness.

One day away from your fake love.

One day away from this life.

One day away from hiding my tears.

One day away from my own bodily scars.

Is that too much to ask?

Is one day a lot?

Just one day.

Eagle

Posted on by WordElixirist

Hanging diamonds on the window sill

While stationary, they were marvellous.

But, fragile as they were, they fell for a tender touch.

Accompanying them, were drops falling from her irises;

Empowered by emotion she dared not name;

For the fear of being told those so hard felt emotions were wrong, was too much.

Umpteenth time it had been, that her feelings were disbanded and deemed unworthy.

She had naught the strength for more.

‘What is your deepest wish?’ Asked her friend, that same night.

‘An eagle, for I want to fly high above and away from this crushing pain.’ 

Mystery

Posted on by WordElixirist

How is it that you’re always so happy? I’m so envious,’ jested his best friend.
His memories of the self inflicted scars, broken nights and failed attempts flashed before his eyes and he smiled at the irony.

Then, he repeated the words of his sister, the words he had once, never understood.
‘Every bright smile is backed by a mystery too hard to understand unless experienced.’

Deserter

Posted on by WordElixirist

The caress of the silver moon cradling and soothing
Swinging her away from the truth
Creating a moment of chimerical terrestrial rapture.
Evanescent bliss broken by the broken memories.
Droplets fall, reflecting the silver shine from above
As the moon lets her into his embrace and the quietude oversees them.
Forgive me, she begs of her other half, for she deserts him and leaves the maze of life, for she, became a deserter.images (9)